5 1/2 Weeks PostPartum: It's Going Well!

I think this has been the longest I've ever gone without writing on here! I just haven't felt like it much, and also I've been going through alot so I started writing in my regular diary. Which basically consists of a notebook & pen - and I can write whatever I want to on there and know it's going to stay private. Sometimes it just helps to get things out on paper, write them down, and clear my head. I'm the type that I don't talk much but I think alot, so actually getting it out helps so much!

I went through a rough time after I wrote in here last. I had a period of about a week where I felt really down. I cried over dumb things, I felt so overwhelmed, frustrated that I wasn't down to pre-baby weight yet, just alot of unrealistic expectations that had not been met so I felt let down, you know? It's interesting, though. I have to say that 4 weeks to the DAY I felt better. On that Tuesday morning when Jack turned 4 weeks, I woke up feeling refreshed (I'd gotten a decent night's sleep where he only woke up once at 3am for half an hour) and ready to really tackle my new life.

Ever since then it's been really going well. Baby blues are gone, and I start each day with a renewed spirit and attitude, excited about what I'll get done that day. I've also been almost exclusively raw for 2 weeks tomorrow! Very cool - I feel so good about that, both mentally and physically. I was weighing in at 148 some days when I was going through that rough time - and that was so depressing, considering that I had gotten down to 138 at one point postpartum.

I'm hovering around 140-141 for the past 3 days now, so I'm hoping to hit the 130's again soon and continue to go down eventually to 120 which is my goal. As far as eating, I love where I'm at right now. I eat exclusively 100% raw, BUT - I am not so strict when it comes to special occasions. For instance, last Saturday night DH & I went out on our first date with the baby. We got a sitter and went to McGrath's Fish House which is an upscale place where a dinner will cost about $50 for two adults. I got salmon with brown rice & oven broiled veggies and had lemon water to drink. NOT raw by any means, but it's the next best thing.

I felt really good after eating it, too - not over the moon or anything, but it settled well in my stomach and I could tell it was easily digested. The bread was really hard to resist - that is always something I love, and I actually took one in my hand and almost ate it. Then I smelled it for some reason, and it was sourdough which I don't really like. Then I was faced with a choice. Eat it just because it's bread and I WANT IT even though it's not all that good...or put it down. So I put it down, and that was such a victory for me!! I completely savored my meal and felt good about myself the next day, continuing on in the same path of eating raw.

Then about 5 days later DH & I took the baby to another city 45 min. away to get the baby circumcised by a holistic/naturpathic children's doctor. We were both really hungry afterwards, but I had my green smoothie with me. I chose instead to go to Baja Fresh with DH which is a freshly made mexican food place. They advertise that nothing is ever cooked in advance, and only the freshest ingredients are used - no freezers, microwaves, canned goods, etc. The tortillas are not made with preservatives, and the beans are made from scratch kind of thing.

I ordered a veggie burrito and enjoyed that very much with fresh salsa - and about a cup of fresh tortilla chips. I didn't feel that great after the chips, but felt good about the fact that I didn't binge on them (order another side of chips) and continued on eating raw afterwards. I actually dropped another pound the next morning so that was encouraging.

I'm really happy with how things are right now. The baby is gaining weight slowly but surely - 11oz. in 10 days, which isn't a ton, but it's progress!! I'm taking 4 capsules of Fenugreek 4x a day, plus a cup of well-brewed Nettle tea. He's a happy baby and is starting to coo & smile, which is so precious.

I hope to add post-partum full-body view pictures to my blog soon. Hopefully at the 6 week mark. That way for future pregnancies, if God blesses us with more, I can compare and also look forward to losing the weight when I get discouraged - to see that it can be done! I'd like to do a comparison of my side view pregnant self with a side view of my 6 week postpartum self. Kind of fun.

He finally fell asleep after fighting it for HOURS - so I better go to bed since it's almost midnight. Maybe he'll sleep a bit longer since he's been up longer than normal fighting it. Here's hoping! =)